I moved to Canberra for work in February 2020. I found friendship, independence and a fulfilling job, but also the isolation of living far away from my family during a pandemic. Here is a diary entry I wrote in November 2020:

This year I have found myself in the days that roll into the next, the moments that feel earned and the unexpected bonds I will hold forever.

You can try to make sense of it. You can try to pin down the joy and the loneliness within the life you never knew was possible, but taking things day by day is easier.

When the world feels like it’ll never stop spinning, you find tranquillity when morning light floods through the curtains just minutes before the alarm chimes.

Home is now some loose concept, caught between where I am and where I was.

Family is all I have ever known, and to have only a few precious days suspended in this chaotic year is a change that I too often compartmentalise.

But then there’s Bronwyn. She keeps me sane. Without even trying, she says exactly the right thing to make me feel seen and heard. All the laughter and heart to hearts have created this safe space in a new city.

Sometime I wonder if this is all a mirage – the sunny walks and sleepy Sunday afternoons. When will the real world shake me out of this dream and refill my days with worry and unrealised dreams. My throat tightens at the thought.

Breathe. You can’t think like that. . . the world is waiting for you on the other side of your fears, a place where hope drives all possibilities.

This year has taught me that life can slow down, it can speed up, but at the end of it all, there is only you and the friends there to listen and walk beside you.